Monday, August 17, 2015

Baby talk


     I can already hear the awwwww! from whoever is looking at the above picture... Am I right?!  :D  :D  :D

     This post has been a loooong way coming... Something along the lines of 7 months (and a half)! I must say, I am feeling a bit disappointed in myself for letting photography and the blog slip out of my array of interests. I know that focusing 110% on my baby is absolutely normal and it is as it should be, it's just... I thought I could be a different kind of mother. There, I said it! (and I have more to say about that!)

     Before baby came I thought I was ready. I thought I knew enough. That I was prepared to be in control. That I was going to be comfortable in this new role and that I won't abandon myself (or my poor husband), that I would be able to do it all... Those disheveled moms you sometimes see in the supermarket, dirty hair, up in a bun, flip-flops, chipped mani, running erratically from aisle to aisle,  barely having a chance to shower, eating in a hurry and peeing on the run... Naaaaa...that wasn't going to be me... Well guess what!?!

     First, let me just say...  I knew nothing, Jon Snow!!! (was that funny? no? I thought it was a little bit funny...ahm. ok!) There is nothing in this world that can prepare you for whatever comes after you give birth to your child.  I might be wrong, some mommy's really do look like they have it all together and they manage to be all fixed up, baby in tow, going on date nights with their hubbies and all that jazz. But not me.  It took me exactly 5 months and 1 week before I could actually say I feel even remotely in control. 5 months!!!!!

     It took me a little while to feel all the mommy-ness and stand up on my own. I'm not even going to mention anything else, because there is not much else I can talk about. My entire being was absorbed by this tiny little person and all of my efforts go into making sure she grows well, healthy and happy. I AM that mom running around looking crazy, not caring if I am wearing flip-flops (again), that my legs are unshaved and forgetting to put on earrings. Because nothing matters anymore, but her. Being on time and on schedule, for her. Yeah, Yeah, you go ahead and tell yourself, like I did, that you will never be this kind of mom. Hey! I wish you all the best. But just in case you will find yourself frantically searching for a lost flip-flop as your baby screams strapped in the stroller half way out the door...remember you heard it here first!  :D :D :D

     All jokes aside though...it's tough, nerve-wrecking, challenging,  distressing, exhausting! You get the picture... But here comes the crazy part: It's also beautiful! It's the most wonderful phase of my life so far. She brightens everything. The amount of love I feel for her, multiplies daily... I literally feel high on love for her. She's just perfect. We are perfect, together. My family of 3. As cliche as it may sound, she gives meaning to our lives, our future is no longer a great unknown, because we now have her to live for. We have to show her the world, teach her how to be a good human, talk all the talks and help bring her dreams to reality.

     Now I am trying my best to slowly find myself again... I bought a new bathing suit, a couple of new t-shirts and a cute pair of  wedge sandals (not up to wearing heels yet), a new mascara, been shaving my legs ( :D ) and am definitely trying to cuddle up to my husband more... This is me, making an effort to be me.

     All we still need is this heat to move on so that we can finally be outside. I can't wait to go to the park, take her for the first time to the beach, let her feel the sand, to the pool with the new floaties I bought for her... Did I mention the super-duper cute bathing suit she has? Oh...you just wait and see!


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